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Thursday, November 4, 2010
4:42 AM
maybe this would work .. lets let out the feelings that hv been killing me inside bby . i was not aware that he came only to love me for a while. i was aiming to be with him forever, but he was not willing to work it out. while i was busy planning for us , he was busy planning his life with another person . it hurts too much, bt all i can do is watch him walk away.. and that's the end of it . there goes my forever . there goes my life . i knw he's gone, but holding onto him has become my way to stay alive. It’s funny how people will erase you from their lives simply because it’s easier than working things out. i miss you. and i hate myself for missing you. but i do. what the fuck happened to us. i know that it’s dead, but, i miss you. we were so close. so close. and now we’re so far apart, and it’s all over. i get it. it’s just difficult. i’ll just keep beating myself up. i have nothing left to believe in and i just don’t know what to do anymore. why did u use our inside joke to that girl? i hate it. and u dedicate that song to her? which u used to dedicate that song to me? ''so big?'' awesome :) pretty mad huh. i hate sharing items. thanks for everything . cant believe u forget the first time u lay eyes on me .. the first time we hang out at pasiris east cc . hw about the first time u held my hand in the bus ? hw bout the time we celebrated hari raya together ? hw bout in the cinema i whisper to ur ears and said i miss you ? hw bout that time during ur belated bday ? 4got bout that ? those cards ? HW ABOUT THE TIME WE SPENT HOURS IN THE BUS ? laughing like nobody business ? if u forget that 2 months journey together . den fuck you :) i hate you. i hate wt u did to me. i hate dt u caused me to feel this way. i hate dt to think bout u all day. i hate dt ily. i hate dt u dont love me. i hate dt ure gone. i hate hw u left. i hate dt u wont talk to me .i hate hate hw ure happy with her. most of all, i hate dt ure in love with sumone else, n im still stuck here picking up the pieces .                                         It's not fair,the way life goes. When things seemed to be great,something would certainly go wrong. You just hurt me. Do you even know what you just did? Most likely not. Do you still remember, I was the one who stood by your side, Whenever you are faced problems? And return, why do you have to do this to me? I was prepared for you to be cheating behind me. I knew it all along. I'm not blind, I can see.. I see your game, I'm not insane, you are hurting me... After everything I have done for you, After everything I had given you, you still followed your heart to actually have the cheek to cheat? Now as I lay here all alone countless of nights after nights, Wondering where you were. I finally realized that you're gone forever Forgetting you will never be back. You made me cry in sober while you told a lie, I knew the truth before I killed it, And I know now that this has got to stop. How many times must you hurt me but still I stayed? Is it that you lost interest in me and found some other? My heart, You stole it from me and ripped it up, Tore into pieces and shatters like its just an unvalued glass. And everything inside is tainted by you. And you never cared when you saw the blade Cut so deep, your blood red smile Became a blood red laugh. Knowing that you had done everything for her Supported her, comforted her, Loved her more than you ever loved yourself. My heart felt like it was stabbed right through. You were never a bit like that when you're with me. Hurt, lost, fear, left out in the dark, edge of breaking down And no one's here to save me. Prolly everyone is ignoring me. There won't be ur laughter to kiss away all the loneliness in my heart anymore I still remember when we laughed at those every little thing we talked. Now all i could ever flash bck were those distant memories, Laughs, hugs, kisses and those silly stuff we did How I wish things would last. It always makes me smile whenever i think about it. Because that is the bestest feeling, I could ever had. I need you like I've never needed before. But to find out you're with another, And I am just..... Just the other bad memory of yours. When moon comes, I lay on my bed, Closing my eyes reminiscing about the past I ended up dreaming about you Its like you're stuck at the back of my head. Don't wake me up my dear sun because When i wake up, reality gonna start eating me up. How i wish u could take me in your arms tonight, Even if it's just for a moment. Hold my hand, my heart And whisper to me that everything will be alright. But time didn't had me by my side. I never wanted this, never wanted to see you hurt. I still see your picture, I still see your grace, I still see your smile, I still hold your face, And I still, break down everytime. I just want to be loved..... By you. Where do we go from here? Correction. Where do i go from here? I can 't believe that you are not near. Your the cause of my every tear, Losing you was my every fear....   |
